Tag: writing retreat

Back from the Boat

Laura Highcove

So apparently I went so head down about the Writing Excuses Cruise coming up that I just simply forgot about writing anything for my blog in over a month. That being said, once again Wxr was awesome. If you remember last year I was so impressed by the Wxr cruise, that despite telling my husband and myself last year that it would be a one time thing, I simply had to go again, and this time I brought the husband.

I was far more relaxed this year because I knew what to expect. It was all the same airports, hotel, cruise ship, and many of the same people, who actually remembered me! We were on shore for an extra day this time which I wasn’t super keen on. Mostly because it felt like I was just hanging in limbo before getting on the boat, and it also meant more meals to pay for. By the time we woke up Sunday morning everyone was talking about how it felt like we’d had a whole convention already but yet we still hadn’t gotten on the boat.

The lines to get onto the cruise ship practically flew compared to last year. I was prepared for the waiting in line, but there was only a minimum amount of waiting before we were on the boat and our rooms were ready shortly after. (We got a little pizza first.)

We had fewer classes this year. Last year was very class heavy and even I, ever the dedicated student, had trouble keeping up. This year they cut the number of classes. I think a little too far. Added to the fact that I didn’t go on any excursions this year, I ended up with a lot more free time than I expected. I did spend much of that with my husband, which may have helped stave off the depressive episodes I had last year, and I still felt like I got in my Wxr people time.

The classes were good. Piper’s class on animals in novels was fun and informative, and Mary Robinette’s impromptu 8am class on short stories was very helpful, even though I’ve heard her give bits of it before. I think the fact that we wrote a flash fiction helped to cement it better, and I’m feeling much more confidant about short stories in general.

I was apprehensive about Dongwon’s class on Writing Good Beginnings because I feel like I’ve been though so many of those classes before, but something about this one struck a chord with me and I realized my first “page” in The Law of the Prince Charming doesn’t have any stakes or reason for the reader to be invested in Tabitha. I had gotten that feedback before but didn’t “see” it, much less understand how to fix it. After Dongwon’s class I was able to see what I was missing and how to fix it. That gives me some more hope for when I send out another batch of queries.

I also went to watch the karaoke, which was far more populated that I expected from a group of writers. They had to close sign-ups at one point because they had so many people already signed up. My husband and I also participated in game night a bit more, which was good because the bar under our room played music that vibrated through the floor until ‘late’ (11:30-11:45 pm). I also recognized a lot of the food offerings at dinner from last year so I was able to avoid the bad ones and get extra of the good ones. Mwahaha! It was wonderful and fabulous, and I’m so hopeful we’ll both be able to go back again next year.

What I Learned on the Wxr Cruise 2018

Laura Highcove

So I already did a post about what happened on the Wxr cruise, in that I really feel like I found my writing tribe. That is wonderful and amazing, but beside that, I also learned a ton of writing skills as well as learning a few new lessons about myself.

The first lecture of the cruise was from Brandon Sanderson on Characterization. It was a more fleshed out version of something he’s spoken on, on the podcast before. It came in handy already as a diagnostic tool for a character people were having a hard time connecting with. It gave me a solid way to look at why people might not like said character, and thus, how to fix it.

He also said something during the Q&A session at the end that really struck me as well. Something like: “As you get better at writing you will try harder things, and as a result, you’ll think you’re a worse writer than you are.” I had been struggling with this rather hard for the past two years, while working on the Huntsman. I remember how easy writing used to be, where I would sit down and pump out words, and yet I had to fight for every inch on the Huntsman. But since hearing the above, I was able to put my head down on the Huntsman and get to ‘The End’ on my rough draft.

Some of the lectures were interesting, but not immediately relevant. More of a ‘file away for later’, like Mary Robinette’s ‘How to Read Outloud’, and Dongwon’s three part lecture on ‘Surviving the Books Business’. There were others that I incorporated into my writing asap like Tempest’s talk on inclusively in writing, Piper’s ‘Writing Romantic Elements’, and Sandra’s “Setting up your Life for Writing”, which went wonderfully into the mentality around writing and how to protect your writing time.

The one lecture that caught me most by surprise was Amal’s lecture on writing poetry. I have never been a fan of poetry. I just never got it, and the people who do are so passionate about it, it’s almost a turn-off. However, the way Amal explained the difference between poetry and prose as the way singing is different from talking really clicked with me. And when she had us try writing some poetry with that distinction, it just …worked. And from what others got up and read in front of the class, it seemed to have worked for a lot of people. It certainly gave me a new appreciation for poetry, and so the exercise she gave us for using poetry to get past ‘stuck spots’ is certainly something I can see myself using.

I also got something very important impromptu critique group that I got into by chance. It was my first time critiquing (and being critiqued) in person, but I was riding high on the safety of the whole Wxr space and so it went really well. Apparently the narrator problem I’d had in the Law of the Prince Charming, that I thought had been fixed was, in fact, still a problem.

And since I was stuck on a boat for several more days with little else to do, I decided I was going to go head down on this problem and figure out how to fix it. Long story short, I realized the problem was with tense and I experimented with switching the prose from past to present. After much reluctance and knashing of teeth on my part (because I hate reading present tense in books), I realized that I was much happier with the way it sounded in general, and got enough feedback saying it did feel better than I am currently in the process of rewriting the book.

But, I think, the most important thing I learned on the cruise happened at dinner on Friday night. I was in a bit of a depressed state because this was right after I had figure out that present tense for my novel sounded better, but before I reached acceptance of the idea, and was ready to leave the table when Mary Robinette came to join us. I stayed because, well, she’s a highly intelligent writer and I like the sound of her voice. At one point she started talking about how she finds the guest speakers for the cruise, and how she has to tell them that they can’t give the 101 or 201 versions of their talks because the Writing Excuses listeners have such a high level of theory already. She says she has to inform her speakers to think of it like they are giving a lecture to their peers, who just happen to be still early in their careers.

It was the first time I thought of connecting myself to published authors with the word peer. I mean I know I’ve gained a lot of skill over the past four or five years, but it wasn’t until that moment it really dawned on me that the only thing standing between me and publication could be that I haven’t found an agent. Not that I’m at the end of my learning by any stretch, but it was certainly a context shift. And, on top of that, I had access to all the other amazing people of the same level who were on the cruise with me.

During the final party, Mary Robinette did warn us that after everything we had learned on the cruise, that writing might be difficult for a while. But I found a new groove since the cruise. The newfound confidence in myself and my skills carried me through a lot of things I had been having difficulty with before the cruise. And that’s how I know this retreat was so successful, because I met so many amazing, wonderful people, and because it inspired me to write better. Totally have to go back again next year.

WXR 2018: Finding My Tribe

Laura Highcove

I started listening to Writing Excuses at the end of season nine, so 2014. And after getting part way into season 10, I went back and listened to the archives. All of them. I found out about the cruise in 2016, and I applied for the scholarship for the past two years, but finally saved up enough money to go this year. I wasn’t sure what to expect. I hung around on the Google group where everyone was talking for months ahead of time. I picked my roommate, Morgan, because she wrote fantasy and didn’t snore.

But it wasn’t until the Saturday when I flew into Houston that the people-interactions really started. I met Eric in the airport using the Discord app everyone was on for conversing on the cruise. Then, since Morgan’s flight was delayed, (There was rough weather, most people got delayed.) Eric and I met up with Michelle and we all shared an Uber to the hotel. Both of them had been on the cruise before, and Michelle let me tag along into the group of people she knew as soon as we got to the hotel. Everyone seemed really nice and entirely non-threatening.

After picking up registration bags, we went behind the waterfall where they had swag for us. I went up to a table with books on it, because of course I did, and the person behind the table began to describe the books. I had to reboot because the voice that was speaking was Dan Wells, and I was entirely unprepared to hear that voice in a non-podcast situation. Then Howard Taylor said something from the table beside him, which furthered the surrealism, and I had to ask Dan to repeat himself because I hadn’t heard what he actually said. He was very nice about it, which bolstered my confidence further, so when I turned and saw Mary Robinette Kowal at a third table, and walked over and asked if she could also speak for me to complete the blowing of my mind. She acquiesced.

I managed to work through the “getting to know you” sheet where you get people to sign your paper based on something about them, like what genre they write or what their job is, by actually talking to people. Though, in truth, I was given a task, and I am good at task completion. But it was also a very comfortable situation. Then those of us who went on the NASA tour further bonded by living through the torrential downpour on our cart train that had no sides.

That night was the cocktail reception, and oddly enough, I settled right into talking with people. Part of it was by that time I had bonded with my roommate, and I’m always braver when I have someone I know around, and part of it was that I sat at a table and almost everyone was a genre writer. Even if I do attend other writing events, I rarely find genre writers, and if I do, they’re all YA. (Not that I have anything against YA. I just feel like I never find adult fantasy writers.) So again, it felt a little surreal to ask what everyone was writing and have so many of them be my same genre.

At this point I was still rather intimidated by the hosts, but I still managed to get my books signed and to ask them to hug my stuffed animal gryffin (That I’ve had all the people who are important in/to my life hug). It was also the first time I was able to meet Brandon Sanderson. I cried a bit, I’ll admit it, but he was perfectly accommodating, and he signed my book and took a picture with me grinning like a silly fangirl. My one regret about the whole situation was that I was simply too overwhelmed to approach him as a writer. It doesn’t help that he wasn’t on the cruise, so while I got to see Mary Robinette, Howard, and Dan as real people, he’s still Brandon Sanderson. At least for now.

The introduction/instruction speech that came at the end of the reception really helped to settle things in my mind, and solidify the feel of what to expect from the cruise. All of the instructors and the helpful team were introduced, as well as the rules for how to treat each other. I know the Wxr hosts have always been pretty big on making a space safe for everyone there, and I was really starting to feel that.

The next day we got on the boat and that’s when things finally started to settle a bit in my mind. All of the Wxrers had red badges that hung from our necks, meaning we could spot each other through the, well frankly, massive crowd of muggles who were on the cruise as well. The classes were simply amazing, though that’s fodder for another post. We all ate dinner together rotating tables so we got to meet other people, as well as the hosts. Morgan and I sat with Dan, Howard, and Mary Robinette on various nights.

And I found the most amazing thing happening. I was interacting with people. People I didn’t know very well, but it was like that red badge was magic. As soon as I saw it, I would meet the other person’s gaze and wave, and they would do the same. Or I could just walk up and start a conversation. We were able to just be comfortable around each other, as people, because we had been brought together by this cruise.

I am not normally one to join in or participate in conversations. I like being on the sidelines, listening to other people say interesting things, but never feeling like I have anything to add to most conversations. And if I do, it’s usually a quick comment and then over. Only at the dinner table, I found so many people with topics they wanted to discuss that were interesting and that I had something to say about. One night I started talking about Supernatural and fan fiction, and I realized almost halfway through the night that I was actually having a good time participating in a conversation. That I had things to say, that these were topics in which I was interested. I have never before had such an actual lengthy conversation with people in a group setting like this, not even among my friends.

I also hopped into a discussion on magic system creation where I felt emboldened to add some to the conversation. And I jumped into a quickly created critique group that all looked at the part of my story, I’ve been trying to fix forever and thought was “okay”, and told me it still didn’t work. And I felt safe getting that feedback, and glad that they were willing to say something.

I had, for the first time, actually found my tribe. So much so that I cried when it was time to leave the boat. After my flight landed in Atlanta I found myself looking through the crowds for red badges and being sad when I remembered I wouldn’t be seeing any. I clung to Discord, that last connection I had to them, and I mourned not being on the cruise anymore.

For the first time I really understood Daisy’s reaction in Agents of SHIELD, after she’s freed from Hive’s control, and she throws herself at him again, begging for him to let her back in. I felt like I had been removed from a situation that felt so right for the first time in my life, that I wasn’t sure what to do without it. Maybe I’m being overly dramatic, and maybe I’m not. But I know I need to figure out a way to be able to go on the cruise again next year. And for now, I’m very grateful for Discord and for everyone involved with putting on and attending this cruise.

Gratitude and the New Normal

Laura Highcove

I’m going to start this post with gratitude. Gratitude for my friends, with whom I spent a wonderful week of discovery at a resort in the Dominican Republic. Gratitude for the Writing Excuses Cruise Team who put together a writing retreat so wonderful I cried when it was finally over. Gratitude for my husband who is so supportive of me and my pursuits. Gratitude for my boss (And friend) who worked with me so I could do these two events, even so annoyingly close together, and took care of my cats while my husband and I were away. Gratitude for my cat Nickel, and the ten wonderful years I got with him. And Gratitude for myself and my stubborn refusal to give up on me.

These past couple of months have been really tough for me emotionally, almost entirely due to Nickel’s rapid decline in health and final day last week. It was difficult for me to remember how many good things I have going on in my life and the amount of support that is readily available. But then that’s part of my depression.

I have been so out of my own normal habits that it’s been uncomfortable trying to go back to them. I didn’t have a weekend at home for a month. My writing has been ridiculously on and off again, and of course I’ve barely looked at social media outside of checking on the new season of Supernatural. Thus why this post is coming in on a ‘not Monday’. I realized I needed to just get something out. Just like I needed to just do my laundry on whatever day, and clean the bathroom finally. I had a lot of life changing experiences all in a very short amount of time and I still haven’t been able to sit down and fully process any of them. There might be no ‘returning to normal’ after this, because my normal has shifted so dramatically.

But even then, the laundry still needs to be done, the bathroom still needs to be cleaned, and I still need to write. So I guess enough has stayed the same.